Future

Author: Seth

"To know what is to come is to be forever haunted by that which you can never change."

Raitou tugged off his final sock, wriggling his feet pleasurably on the cold metal floor of his room before tossing the smelly article of clothing to join its partner at the foot of his bed. Normally he wouldn't be this sloppy, but the scarred panthryan was tired and really didn't feel like making the extra effort of ferrying his dirty laundry to the small hamper that sat next to his door. He'd do it tomorrow.

Settling onto his bed with a sigh, the silvery-headed soldier paused and held out a single hand, ticking off the passing seconds. At the count of ten, he smiled wanly and finally allowed himself to settle down on the firm bunk.

At which point a frantic knocking broke out at his door.

Of course.

Listing off a litany of mental curses, Rai hauled himself out of bed. And he'd been so ready for a good day's sleep too…

"What is it!?" The assassin barked moodily, yanking open his door. "Can't this wait unti- Ooof!"

Raitou stared dumbly down at the blue-haired figure of Shadow who'd shot through the door the moment he'd opened it and had latched her arms around his mid-riff like some fleshy vice. The girl was crying.

"H-Hey, what's wrong…?" The ex-mercenary asked, flustered as he awkwardly patted his companion's shoulder.

"I-I don't want you to die…" Shadow hiccupped, burying her face into his chest.

Rai blinked. Ok, where the hell had that come from? They had been fighting side by side for years and this was the first time she'd ever voiced such a fear.

"Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere," he whispered, even as he mentally swore at himself with the foulest language he could conjure. He'd uttered that promise before. Twice. He'd walked away both times with another life on his conscience and a word that was worth less than nothing.

Shadow nodded miserably, wiping her eyes on his muscle shirt.

"Sorry," she sniffled, offering no explanation for her sudden breakdown.

"It's all right," Rai assured her, deconstructing his perpetual personal bubble with a supreme effort of will and giving her a somewhat stiff hug.

Part of it was because he truly cared for his wonderfully simple-minded partner, but another part of it, the one he always hated himself for, was because that cold, analytical section of his mind knew just how much she meant to him. He held no illusions about his own mental stability – he couldn't afford to, given his career – and if Shadow broke, he knew he wouldn't be far behind.

Shadow nodded mutely, as much to tell her friend that she acknowledged his statement as to convince herself of its validity.

"I-I think I'm okay now…" The cyclopic girl mumbled as she drew away from her scarred companion.

Reaching forward, Shadow gently plucked at the yellow bandana that decorated Rai's left arm, still in the exact same place she'd first tied it.

"Could I… Could I take this with me? Just for a little bit?" She asked hesitantly.

Rai immediately slipped the length of bright cloth from his arm and offered it to his closest friend. He didn't know why she wanted it back, if only for a short time, and he wasn't about to ask. If it helped her feel better, that's all that mattered.

"Thanks," Shadow mumbled, gingerly accepting the accessory which she'd found all those years ago.

Raitou watched his partner leave without a word, staring at the door through which she'd left before shuffling back to his bed. The ex-Royal Guardsman tucked himself in and lay his head down on the thin pillow that crowned the top of the bed.

He didn't fall asleep for a long time.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Shadow sat cross-legged in that immense field of emerald grass, her ears filled with the rustle of swaying verdure, the caress of the wind and the insistent badgering of a certain blue-haired little terror.

The young spy had attention only for her eyes, though, which were riveted to a crude, crayon drawing. One featuring the other little bluette who was sporting the exact same bandana Shadow had begged of Rai hours (or maybe minutes, she could never tell here) before, and a one-armed stickman with a shock of silvery hair, clothed in a robe as black as Death.

"Nee-chan! Pay attention to Fuu, Shadow nee-chan!"

Slowly, Shadow lifted her eyes from the crayon rendered Fuu to her real live counterpart who was showcasing her recently acquired ability to handstand.

Fuu beamed with uninhibited pride at her accomplishment before her balance wavered and she fell on her rear with a squeak.

Shadow smiled sadly at the little girl. With great care, she folded up the crayon drawing and slipped it into her pocket.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Shadow's hands shook violently, barely managing to hang onto the match and its corresponding box. The bandana hung innocently off her bedpost, its sun-like design staring her in the face.

Waveringly, the one-eyed girl held the match to the rough strip of phosphorous that ran the length of the matchbox.

'Shadow nee-chan's the best! Fuu wants'ta be just like Shadow nee-chan!'

Shadow's hands shook, and the match spluttered to life. The young woman stared as the flame started to crawl down the length of the wood, her body shaking harder with each passing second.

In a violent motion, the blue-haired girl hurled both the match and the box at her wall, sinking limply to the floor as the box exploded against the wall and wooden matchsticks rained down upon the floor.

She couldn't do it. She just couldn't do it.

Tears began trickling down her face as she stared at that godforsaken piece of yellow cloth, mocking her from its perch on her bed.

"Why does it have to be this way?" Shadow sobbed quietly into the floor, blind to all but her own tears.

And the cycle groaned onwards, impervious as it always has been and always will be.