Self-Doubt

Author: Seth

"Encouraging your children to succeed is all well and good, but sacrificing their emotional security to do so crosses the line."

The night enshrouding the Jericho compound was silent. Unnaturally so. The usual, never-ending hum that emanated from the surrounding city was still there, but so muted that it may as well have not been.

All in all, the inhabitants of the base found it an enjoyable change. For the soldiers on duty the lack of interfering noise lent them an extra edge during their vigil. The other operatives were able to enjoy a far more restful sleep in the folds of the unexpected silence. In fact, only one member of the Jericho army remained unaffected by the change in noise level.

A tide of synthetic notes and beeps swirled around Bob’s room, accompanied by the uniform click-clack of thumbs on controller buttons.

Sitting in a state of quasi-mediatation – that odd state of half-rest, half-action that was the gate guardian’s replacement for sleep – Bob watched with a casual interest as units marched, battles raged, and experience accumulated. Every now and then the masked teen would save, or re-start the console, depending on whether he’d been RNG blessed or screwed respectively.

A knock on his door – soft, yet firm enough to cut through the mechanical soundscape – brought Bob out of his half-conscious state.

“Door’s open!” The brunette called out by way of invitation.

The door creaked open, allowing Gryff to poke his head in. The fair haired gryphane took a quick look around the room before letting himself in.

“Still on the same chapter?” Gryffin as he took in the T.V. screen. His long-time friendship with the other gryphane had lent him a competent understanding of the games Bob played.

“Nah,” Bob shook his head as he calmly paused and selected ‘Restart’. “Second playthrough. I’d be further along, but Ryuu’s stamina keeps on getting the shaft and Tatane keeps criticalling Haru, so...” The brown eyed game enthusiast gestured vaguely at the screen where the words ‘Chapter 3: Siege of Argenfluo’ were emblazoned in bold, shining, golden letters.

Bob paused as a stray thought drifted through his psyche. Looking out his window he took note of how dark it had gotten since he last checked.

“It’s my shift, isn’t it?” He turned to Gryff.

Gryffin nodded absently, his attention captured by the television screen. Bob had paused the game on Ryuuto’s stat screen, and when the blonde soldier looked closer he noticed that all of the iconic hero’s statistics were perfectly even, with the one exception of his stamina which was lagging behind by two points.

Noticing the direction of Gryff’s gaze, Bob abruptly turned off the console, along with the T.V.

“Thanks for getting me.” The masked soldier mumbled as he walked over to the wall, retrieving the naginata that was leaning there.

Gryff said nothing until the other gryphane moved to walk past him.

“We’re proud of you,” Gryffin placed his hand on Bob’s shoulder. “For who you are.” His hand brushed against the length of red fabric his fellow gryphane used to bind his hair. “Not for who she thinks you should be. Remember that, all right?”

Bob remained silent, but nodded his head before gently pushing past Gryff.

Gryffin remained in the room for a couple more minutes, lost in thought. Finally snapping himself out of his reverie, the blonde gryphane cast one last glance at the now black television screen before exiting the room, locking and closing the door behind him with a soft click.